my ex and I were vegan together. After we broke up, I stuck with it, but she didn’t. I accepted that. I didn’t try to control her. We stayed best friends.
As time went on, my feelings about animal cruelty became quite stronger. I saw Dominion long after I went vegan and realized just how morally indefensible it was to consume animals.
One day, I brought up Dominion with her in conversation and suggested she check it out. She made a promise to me that she was going to watch it.
Years passed, and she never watched it. At one point, I mentioned it again. Again she promised, “I promise I will watch it this week. I will.”
Then she started posting IG photos of her meals, full of meat. It was obvious to me she didn’t keep her promise.
Recently, she sent me a video of a cat in a bag nearly going into a trash incinerator until one of the workers saw the cat. The cat’s owner had thrown him/her away to be disposed.
I had a “OMG” reaction. And she replied the cat owner was evil. I just couldn’t help myself. I had to say, “Yes, but what happens to livestock is also just as evil.”
And then she just went off. Accused me of shaming her. Told me there’s always evil in the world, and to stop bringing it up.
I replied back that the only reason I bring it up is because she made a promise to watch Dominion. I have no interest in shaming anyone. I asked her to tell me how I’m supposed to advocate for animals if recommending a documentary wasn’t the solution. She just left the message unread. 3 weeks passed.
So I removed her from a Spotify family plan I’ve had her in for years. She messaged me asking about it. I brought up that she villified me for speaking on something I care about, and leaving me unread when I replied.
She then said that I make her feel stupid and small and that I shame her. And to stop forcing my beliefs.
I replied, “I’m not forcing my beliefs. That’s gaslighting. It’s another way of shutting me up and not letting me advocate for animals.”
Her final response was that she doesn’t care to go back and forth. That our of her self-respect, she doesn’t care to keep this relationship.
I supported this girl financially through covid.
I went to her church with her, even though I had no interest in Christianity.
I forgave her when she cheated on me.
I supported her emotionally when her new guy got her pregnant and she had to get an abortion.
I supported her emotionally when her mom who she never called died, and gave her grace when she said, “I should have listened to you. I should have called her more.”
I supported her emotionally when her new guy got arrested and went to prison. And continued to support her as she went into debt bailing him out and paying his legal fees.
Yet somehow I crossed the line by holding her accountable to a promise that I never twisted her arm to make in the first place…
Please tell me, what do you think? Thank you.